What are Family Constellations?
Family Constellations were developed by Bert Hellinger, a German psychotherapist, who discovered that many of the persistent problems that cause suffering in people's lives were actually 'entanglements' within their family system.
In other words, people's inability to thrive in certain areas of their lives isn't due to lack of effort or capability but rather they are caught up in forces bigger than them which are difficult, if not impossible, to overcome without first acknowledging the underlying family dynamic.
This inability to thrive may be experienced as depression, addiction, mental illness, physical illness or symptoms, infertility, inability to maintain long-term intimate relationships, being drawn towards death, patterns of self-sabotage etc.
He developed a group therapeutic process whereby these hidden family dynamics, often coming from previous generations, could be revealed using the movements, feelings & expressions of people from the group who 'take on' or represent family members, illnesses & other aspects of the family system during the session. These dynamics, once revealed, may be fully acknowledged and integrated back into the system, restoring balance and the natural flow of love.
Along with group process, methods of working one-to-one were also developed which allow these dynamics to be explored & potentially healing movements to unfold - see "Individual Constellations" section below.
Individual Constellations
One-to-one constellation sessions use either figurines or footprints to represent family members/symptoms etc. This provides a profound method of exploring hidden family dynamics and initiating healing movements that can help facilitate shifts at a very deep level in people's live.
These sessions can be either standalone or may come about as part of a series of CranioSacral sessions, where occasionally a pattern presents that is too complex or whose source is too deep within the family system to release via CST - in these cases we can use an Individual Constellation session to explore the underlying dynamic from a different perspective.
Phone:
Call or text Mark to book an Individual Constellation or with any questions at all
What can Constellations help with?
Constellations can be profoundly life-changing on what might be called a 'soul' level - they address areas that are wider in scope than many traditional therapies. As such almost any issue can be looked at through the lens of the family system, but areas that are often addressed include:
- Health problems - illnesses & symptoms
- Concern for children's health or passing burdens on to them
- Suicidal tendencies or being drawn toward death
- Feeling stuck and unable to take steps forward
- Depression
- Addiction
- Challenging relationships with family members
- Adoption
- Feeling bigger than one or both of your parents
- Inability to receive love
- Inability to retain money or a challenging relationship to money
- Inability to find a romantic partner or challenges maintaining a romantic relationship
Examples
Early death
A woman presents with a sense of depression and guilt that she cannot seem to shift - as if her life is devoid of 'juice'.
Enquiring further reveals that her mother was always a little 'cold' to her growing up and that her grandmother behaved similarly with her mother.
Setting up the constellation with people (or figurines) shows the client's mother is facing away from her husband & daughter toward her own mother, who in turn doesn't notice she exists as all of her focus is on the ground.
When asked about any lost children the client remembers that, yes her grandmother did lose a girl before her mother was born.
Adding in a representative for this lost girl, who lays on the floor, the room becomes very still and the grandmother doubles over in pain.
She is then turned to face this child.
Acknowledging how painful it is to look and that this - her first child - died, allows the grandmother to feel her grief. After some time she can now really see the child and let them into her heart.
After some more time embracing she can acknowledge her loss and let them go, so they can both be at peace.
This allows her to now turn and face her daughter, the client's mother. The mother acknowledges that she had an older sister she never met, and some sentences help let go of any survivor guilt she may be carrying. She is now ready to face her own daughter, the client - perhaps for the first time. She can now connect to her and really see her as she is, no longer pining for her own mother who could never really meet her.
This movement, that reestablishes the correct order of love flowing downstream from one generation to the next and reconnects the female line, initiates a dramatic increase in 'life-force' for the client now that she has the full power of her female ancestors behind her.
Alcoholism
A man presents with a story of how he has problems with alcohol and anger and how it is affecting his relationship with his wife & children.
Further probing reveals that his father also has alcohol issues and that his Grandfather died when fighting in WW2 when his father was just an infant.
Setting up representatives (or figurines) for the client, his Wife, his Mother, Father and Alcohol shows how Alcohol is acting as a type of support for the client & his Father, and helping to keep their rage at bay, but at the same time suppressing their life force and so the women feel like they must take charge and resent the men for this.
At this point the client recalls that he grandmother remarried and had more children but only revealed to her first son that he had another father well into his adulthood.
Bringing in representatives for the Grandfather, the father's Stepfather, Rage & War show that the Grandfather is heartbroken about his son but feels unable to connect to him and is furious with the Grandmother & Stepfather.
The Grandmother is turned to face him and acknowledges him as the father of her first son, and honours him as her first husband. This creates space for the Stepfather to also acknowledge the Grandfather's place as the first husband. In turn the Grandfather can now thank him for raising his child. The Grandfather is then reunited with his son, the client's Father, where they embrace for some time.
Now feeling stronger, the Father can stand without the support of Alcohol, and provide that missing support for his son, who in turn can now also stand tall.
War, Rage & Alcohol shrink in stature and move toward the edge of the space, no longer affecting the family dynamics so intensely. The women, now feeling supported by their available partners, report feeling relaxed and able to unite with them more fully.
Family Constellation Workshops
"Maybe you are searching among the branches, for what only appears in the roots" ~Rumi
Phone:
Call or text Mark to register interest for the next workshop